Cathy Bishop

Hooray for the Holidays!

Here’s a reminder of the many ‘hooray’ moments singles may experience with their family during these joyous holiday seasons.

1)    Dinner for One? Ever notice how the people with the smallest party get seated first at restaurants? The reality is that it’s so much easier to seat a single guest even at the most exclusive restaurants. That same reality applies to your family’s holiday gathering where seating availability is at a premium. Your family will be simply delighted to see you show up stag; one less space needed at the dinner table.

2)    Lend me your ear? I can, at times, be an exceptionally social butterfly. I can’t think of anyone who wants to sit around any longer than necessary waiting for me (or anyone else for that matter) to finish yapping it up wit the fam. As a single attendee, you can yap it up with the family for as long as you like without the disruption of someone else’s need or desire to ‘get back on the road.’ Your family will be thrilled to have someone with whom they can chat without being interrupted by someone either glaring at you or beeping the horn in the car or the continuous ‘let’s go’ text messages sent to you from across the room. I am aware that for some of you this may be the very reason you’d love to have someone with you so that you can make your timely exit before you’re pulled into the abyss of Uncle Festers’ theory on world change. But just remember that this segment is about what makes your family happy to see you single.

3)    Kid table monitor – Big family points here. Everyone loves a volunteer right? Your family will be so happy that you are single because rarely do couples volunteer to monitor the kid’s dinner table. By hanging out at the kid’s table (always a preference for me) you get to spend time with some of your favorite pint-sized relatives. There usually aren’t too many mates excited about being seated at such a table.

4)    Go Greener – This can be your contribution to a greener world…uh society…uh community—well,  maybe just your family. Your family will be happy to know that you represent their greener pasture even if just for the day. To the single relatives you are the messiah, the rock star, you are who they will aspire to be…you are their role model. I can recall being single at a family event and having a cousin come up to me and announce that I was her ‘Sheroe’. Boy did my ego get a boost that day. So, the singles are happy and proud to see you as a positive representative of their group. But to the couples you just may represent greener pastures even though most of the time these greener pastures are a two way mirror.

Let’s take a closer look at this one.

As you enter the room really take a true assessment of the situation. Try not to show up with the SUV mentality (Single & Unattached Victim). SUVs are so anti-green. As they say, the grass always looks greener on the other side. As I said this usually turns out to be a two way mirror with the other person gazing into your fantasy induced ‘greener’ while simultaneously you’re coveting their imaginary ‘greener.’

Take this opportunity to look into the eyes of your attached relatives, observe the couples’ body language, and listen( you won’t need much coxing for this) to the flow and dynamic of their communication at the dinner table. Heck, if you can really pull this one off you will surely feel like you are on direct assignment from a singles boot camp. But you’ll also learn a lot… a lot about what you want and don’t want in your next relationship as well as eliminating the ‘greener’ myth about couples at the family gatherings. So, go forth and no longer observe couple dynamics in a covetous way but rather as research for your future fantastic relationships.

Keep smiling and enjoy the journey- you rock star you!